Follow-Through Is Self-Care: How to Build Self-Trust as a Christian Woman
Self-care is often misunderstood. It’s not just rest or saying no. It’s also doing what you said you would do. Follow-through is one of the most practical ways to build self-trust, reduce mental clutter, and live in alignment with your faith.
What Follow-Through Really Is
Follow-through means deciding, planning, and doing the thing you said you would do. Over time, this consistency builds trust with yourself just like it does in relationships with others.
Why Broken Self-Trust Feels So Heavy
When we stop trusting ourselves, we experience mental noise, self-doubt, and harsh inner dialogue. This isn’t a character flaw. It’s often the result of years of putting ourselves last.
Follow-Through as Stewardship
Keeping promises to yourself is not selfish. It’s stewardship. You cannot pour from an empty place or steward what you continually abandon.
Why Follow-Through Feels Hard
Overcommitting, skipping planning, expecting motivation, and leaving no margin all make follow-through harder than it needs to be.
How to Practice Follow-Through
Choose one thing that matters
Plan for imperfect days
Keep promises small and meaningful
Acknowledge yourself when you follow through
Conclusion
Follow-through is how you rebuild trust with yourself. Not through pressure or perfection, but through faithful, consistent care. You are worth showing up for.
Watch Here…
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10:37:01 Welcome to the Christian Life Coach Podcast. I'm Shanna, your Christian life coach.
10:37:06 I hope women who feel overwhelmed, stretch thin, or stuck in patterns that don't match the life
10:37:12 God created them for. If you've ever felt that quiet tug, that sense that you were made for more than how you're living right now,
10:37:21 That's not your imagination.
10:37:23 That's your spirit craving alignment.
10:37:27 peace and purpose.
10:37:28 Here, we start with identity, because when you know who you are in Christ,
10:37:33 You finally know how to show up.
10:37:36 We talk renewed thoughts, simple habits,
10:37:39 emotional resilience and sustainable rhythms.
10:37:42 That help you stop surviving on scraps,
10:37:45 And start living with intention and courage.
10:37:48 Jesus said, you are salt, and you are light.
10:37:51 That means you are created to live differently and shine differently from the inside out.
10:37:57 If you're ready to grow, to simplify, and to become the woman God designed you to be,
10:38:03 You're in the right place.
10:38:05 Life coaching is life-changing, one renewed thought at a time.
10:38:10 Let's do this together.
10:38:17 Welcome to episode 49 of the Christian Life Coach Podcast.
10:38:24 This month, I have been talking about…
10:38:30 self-care.
10:38:32 in… in a bit of a different way.
10:38:35 And we started out with how
10:38:40 making a decision, deciding,
10:38:43 is self-care.
10:38:45 And then, last week, I talked about how…
10:38:50 planning…
10:38:52 is self-care. You make the decision.
10:38:55 And then you make a plan.
10:38:57 And that is all…
10:39:00 parts of self-care. It is… it can be considered
10:39:03 self-care. And I don't know if you know this or not, but I wrote a book. It is a 31-day devotional,
10:39:12 called Self-Care as Stewardship.
10:39:15 And… I am all about self-care.
10:39:18 I'm all about…
10:39:20 the different… the different things that we consider self-care, and how
10:39:26 self-care is not…
10:39:28 I do not believe that…
10:39:32 nannies, petties, spa days, vacations…
10:39:35 I don't bel… I don't call those things self-care.
10:39:39 I think of self-care as the foundations of how we are actually taking care of ourself.
10:39:46 of our mind,
10:39:49 our spirit, our body,
10:39:51 our heart, the resources that God has
10:39:56 given to us, how we take care of those things, that's what I view as self-care.
10:40:03 And you can… I…
10:40:07 put the link to my book in the show notes. You… I would love for you to go grab one for yourself and copies for your friends.
10:40:17 And this month, it's not too late,
10:40:20 If you get a copy of Self-Care Stewardship, a 31-day devotional,
10:40:25 We're 13 days into the month right now. When you hear this, we'll be 21 days into the month, so it's getting to the end.
10:40:34 But I do have a…
10:40:36 Facebook group called…
10:40:39 self-care stewardship, January 2026.
10:40:42 And I am going live in that Facebook group every morning.
10:40:46 And just kind of discussing that day's…
10:40:50 reading.
10:40:52 And if you don't get in in time for that, I apologize.
10:40:56 Um, but there is…
10:40:59 there's so much good stuff in there, and it's so encouraging.
10:41:02 And I would love to share my thoughts on self-care with you.
10:41:09 Okay, so…
10:41:13 We talked about deciding as self-care last week, it was planning as self-care.
10:41:19 And this week, it is follow-through as self-care.
10:41:26 How keeping promises to yourself
10:41:30 builds self-trust,
10:41:32 And studies your life.
10:41:34 And as a Christian, that can kind of sound like…
10:41:42 self-trust, self-confidence…
10:41:45 Self, self, self.
10:41:46 But really, it is all about being a good student.
10:41:52 steward with yourself.
10:41:56 So, when we're building self-trust,
10:41:59 We are living in congruence.
10:42:02 We are…
10:42:04 following through. We are doing what we say we're going to do.
10:42:11 And as we all know,
10:42:13 As women,
10:42:16 Usually, we are really, really good at showing up for other people.
10:42:22 We are good for showing up, good at showing up for appointments,
10:42:25 Deadlines that other people have set for us.
10:42:28 We show up for our kids, we show up for our jobs, we show up for…
10:42:34 church, and our…
10:42:36 the things that we volunteer are there. We show up for the commitments that we've made,
10:42:43 outside of ourselves.
10:42:47 And in doing that, which… and that's all great, like, we want to be people that keep our word, right?
10:42:54 And…
10:42:56 We so often…
10:42:59 make commitments to ourselves.
10:43:01 And then we just kind of quietly drop those commitments.
10:43:07 And… I'm not here… I am not here about blame or shame.
10:43:12 I am not here to encourage regret.
10:43:15 I want us to…
10:43:17 become aware?
10:43:19 And use that awareness to spur us on.
10:43:23 It's not failure, it's not laziness.
10:43:27 We've just kind of eroded our trust in ourself.
10:43:31 We…
10:43:33 We have allowed commitments to fall by the wayside so much.
10:43:38 that we don't trust that we're going to do what we say we're gonna do for ourselves, so we stop,
10:43:45 even deciding that we're gonna do it.
10:43:49 And when we practice follow-through,
10:43:53 this… this self-care practice of follow-through, it creates
10:43:59 peace and confidence and stability.
10:44:03 And we don't want to follow through just
10:44:06 Just for discipline's sake.
10:44:08 it's not about, I'm disciplined, I will do it.
10:44:11 We follow through as an act of stewardship, of stewarding well.
10:44:16 The gifts that God has given us,
10:44:18 And living into being the person
10:44:23 that God created us to be.
10:44:27 Now, self-trust.
10:44:31 It's basically, simply…
10:44:35 I decided I was going to do this thing for myself.
10:44:40 And I'm the only one…
10:44:43 that is accountable for this and to this.
10:44:46 I make a plan,
10:44:49 And then I follow through.
10:44:51 And when I decide I'm going to do something,
10:44:53 And I follow through on it.
10:44:56 I developed trust in myself that I can do what I say I'm gonna do.
10:45:00 When we make a commitment to somebody else, and we follow through,
10:45:05 They learn that they can trust us.
10:45:07 When we decide something for ourselves,
10:45:11 And we follow through. We learn that we can trust ourselves.
10:45:17 And it's repetition,
10:45:20 It's showing up, it's following through over time.
10:45:26 Being consistent, not perfect.
10:45:30 And I… I love the concept of consistency is more important than intensity.
10:45:35 Get consistent at doing something, even if it's at a very low level.
10:45:41 or for a very short time, but you get consistent doing the thing, and then you can increase
10:45:46 the intensity. You can increase
10:45:50 Um, the amount or the time, or whatever.
10:45:56 When we don't have that self-trust, when we have broken trust with ourselves so often that we don't get to experience that self-trust,
10:46:07 It creates a lot of mental noise.
10:46:10 Why can't I just do what I say I'm gonna do? I wanna… why can't I be a person that does what I say I'm gonna do?
10:46:16 I… I never… I never follow through. It's just, like, a lot of repet…
10:46:22 repetitive thoughts.
10:46:25 It's self-doubt. It's overthinking, it's harsh self-talk.
10:46:30 And…
10:46:32 Honestly, we were just never meant. We were never taught. We were not… we were meant to.
10:46:38 We were never taught to build trust with ourselves on purpose.
10:46:44 was never a thing. It was…
10:46:46 Show up for other people, do what you say you're gonna do for other people.
10:46:50 And, like…
10:46:52 This wasn't even a thing, right?
10:46:57 So…
10:47:02 Self-care, when we… we want… I mean, and when I'm…
10:47:06 self-care is my, like, it's my foundational thing that I talk about, right?
10:47:12 And… when we are talking about building self-trust,
10:47:17 Like, the foundation, like, the first thing that I really want to focus on is, how do I take care of myself well?
10:47:23 So that I can take care of others well.
10:47:26 And… self-care…
10:47:30 looks like… getting rest.
10:47:35 taking breaks.
10:47:38 Doing what you said you're gonna do.
10:47:42 It's drinking water.
10:47:46 It's eating food thatourishes and energizes your body.
10:47:52 It's investing in relationships. It's creating connecting… connection points in
10:47:59 the important relationships in your life. It's spending time with God.
10:48:03 It's moving your body.
10:48:08 And self-care includes doing what you say you're going to do.
10:48:14 Which… lowers the amount of mental clutter it
10:48:20 stops the second-guessing, it leads to calm, it leads to internal safety.
10:48:28 And… and we're doing this from a place of
10:48:33 integrity of living in alignment
10:48:37 with who we believe ourselves to be. It's not about white-knuckling, it's not about willpower.
10:48:44 It's living in congruence. I do what I say I'm going to do, whether it's for somebody else, or
10:48:50 Whether it's for myself.
10:48:53 And we… it creates an anchor. It's an anchor
10:48:57 that is, um…
10:48:59 that is attached to that integrity.
10:49:02 to that faith that I live from.
10:49:05 And it starts from… it starts internally.
10:49:09 And we… when we study ourselves,
10:49:12 Knowing that we can trust ourselves,
10:49:16 then we…
10:49:17 kind of study the life around us, too.
10:49:21 everything falls into line.
10:49:25 Now, we…
10:49:29 We're always gonna show up for other people. We're gonna follow through on what we say we're going to do for other people, whether we want to or not. Like, we can be all gung-ho when we say we're gonna do something,
10:49:39 And then when it comes time to do it, you're like, why did I say I would do that?
10:49:44 I don't want to, I don't want to, but you're gonna do it because you said you were gonna do it, and because they're trusting that you're going to do it.
10:49:50 And…
10:49:53 We do this because it's that… there's that external…
10:49:58 Um, that external…
10:50:01 accountability, or being relied on from somebody outside of ourselves.
10:50:07 And internally, we're inconsistent.
10:50:10 When it comes down to being
10:50:14 accountable to ourselves.
10:50:15 We're not consistent, we're not reliable.
10:50:19 And what are… like, why? Obviously, it makes so much sense. When we do things for other people, when we show up for other people, we feel good about ourselves.
10:50:29 We might get external praise from other people.
10:50:33 We, um…
10:50:36 we… it feels good. We get that praise, we get that external reinforcement,
10:50:42 And…
10:50:44 We silence the guilt around
10:50:48 not prioritizing ourselves.
10:50:53 We think that keeping promises to ourselves is selfish, because really, it might… keeping a promise to myself, saying yes to me,
10:51:01 might require that I say no to somebody else or something else.
10:51:05 probably will sometimes.
10:51:09 So we think that keeping promises to ourselves
10:51:13 is selfish. Well, they really need me, so I need to go help them.
10:51:18 So I can't do this thing that I said I was gonna do for myself.
10:51:21 Even if it really matters.
10:51:25 You cannot steward well.
10:51:28 what you continually abandon.
10:51:30 Now, there are going to be things that come up, absolutely.
10:51:34 But, it should be the exception to the rule, not the rule.
10:51:40 And it's just… this is just the way that we've operated. This is what we have practiced.
10:51:46 putting ourselves last on the list.
10:51:49 So that we can give to everybody else.
10:51:52 And then we're depleted, and we're not giving from a place of overflow,
10:51:57 We're giving from a place of depletion,
10:52:02 of… we have to white-knuckle to keep going. We're exhausted.
10:52:06 We are resentful.
10:52:08 all of those things, and what if we…
10:52:12 Kept our word to ourself.
10:52:15 steward ourselves well.
10:52:17 did these basic foundational self-care habits
10:52:21 And then we could give from the overflow.
10:52:24 not, like, shaking out the last drips in the glass, but we are being… we are so overflowed that we want to… we can't help
10:52:35 but pour out into other people.
10:52:43 And… when we're working on this,
10:52:49 It's not really about…
10:52:52 what we… what we do, what we accomplish.
10:52:56 It's really, who are we becoming in the process?
10:53:01 Our habits shape our identity.
10:53:05 We become…
10:53:07 what we practice.
10:53:10 I am a well-watered woman. I am well-rested. I give…
10:53:16 from the overflow,
10:53:18 that has been poured into me.
10:53:21 I keep my word.
10:53:23 I can be trusted.
10:53:25 I follow through.
10:53:28 And now…
10:53:30 The things that I'm talking about, and it could be anything, like, whatever it is that you commit to doing for yourself,
10:53:38 It can be anything.
10:53:41 The things that I really talk about foundationally
10:53:48 Before you can promise yourself
10:53:50 you know, extravagant things.
10:53:53 Are you hydrating well?
10:53:56 Are you moving your body consistently?
10:54:00 Are you going to bed at a decent time to get enough sleep?
10:54:04 Are you planning ahead?
10:54:07 So that you have order and predictability in your life.
10:54:15 Are you connecting with the people that you love?
10:54:18 Are you…
10:54:20 um, fostering your relationship with God.
10:54:25 And if you can't keep your word to yourself on those things,
10:54:29 It's gonna be really hard to keep your word to yourself on other things.
10:54:36 So we want to establish habits
10:54:39 that we…
10:54:42 that we develop self-trust
10:54:45 like, you decide what you're gonna do, you make a plan, what are the habits that are going to help you to achieve that thing that you want to achieve?
10:54:53 And the habits are so important,
10:54:57 But it's who you're becoming in the process
10:55:01 of practicing those habits.
10:55:03 That really matters.
10:55:09 Now, follow through…
10:55:12 It can feel hard.
10:55:15 we can… I never do what I say I'm gonna do.
10:55:19 Um, and that, I mean, I've repeated that just in this episode so many times, because it's something that comes up all the time.
10:55:26 Sometimes, we don't keep our word to ourselves because…
10:55:30 We over-commit. So, when I decide that I am going to build self-trust,
10:55:37 I'm gonna be really careful about what I commit to.
10:55:42 So, when I make a decision,
10:55:45 I want to make decisions based on…
10:55:51 based on the… the assumption that I'm going to follow through. So I don't… I want to commit to only those things that really matter,
10:56:00 that I want to…
10:56:02 really hold myself accountable to that I want to follow through on.
10:56:06 So, one of the things that gets in the way is over-committing.
10:56:10 Another thing is skipping planning.
10:56:12 Not really looking at the plan, seeing what fits, what doesn't fit.
10:56:18 Um, another thing is expecting motivation.
10:56:22 We don't need motivation.
10:56:24 to do anything.
10:56:27 I mean, if you're caring for an infant,
10:56:30 And they have a dirty diaper. You don't have to feel motivated to change the diaper.
10:56:36 It's just what you do.
10:56:38 And if we can practice… get these habits
10:56:43 into a rhythm of our life, and just… and practice them.
10:56:49 And practice them until it's just what we do.
10:56:52 We don't need motivation.
10:56:54 And we don't create margin. We don't allow for times…
10:56:59 to really… to just rest, or margin
10:57:04 that allows time to catch up on something that…
10:57:09 took more plan than… more time than I thought, or something that shows up unexpectedly.
10:57:15 We need margin in our lives.
10:57:21 Another thing that gets in the way
10:57:24 of our following through, or making it feel hard, is
10:57:28 When we want something, it's not the same as planning for it.
10:57:36 wanting…
10:57:37 might just be wishing.
10:57:39 But if we plan for it, then we have something to act on, to follow through on.
10:57:46 And often, broken follow-through, not following through, comes from unrealistic plans, or no plans at all. So we want our plans to be realistic,
10:57:56 We want to set ourselves up for success,
10:57:59 What fits? Where does it fit?
10:58:03 And it's not about trying harder,
10:58:05 It's about…
10:58:09 deciding…
10:58:11 from a place of wisdom,
10:58:13 And understanding, looking at the full picture, looking at the details,
10:58:18 do I really want to do this thing?
10:58:22 right now. Maybe it's something you want to do, but it's not quite the time to do it.
10:58:28 So, here's what I want you to do.
10:58:31 Choose one thing that actually matters.
10:58:36 Not everything, not a whole reset, not a whole new life. One thing.
10:58:42 It could be drinking water.
10:58:44 planning your day, moving your body.
10:58:49 Um, spending time with your loved one.
10:58:52 Writing a gratitude list, like, whatever it is, what works for you,
10:58:56 in the realm of self-care and building self-trust,
10:59:02 And then when you're planning, don't plan for the perfect day.
10:59:08 Plan for…
10:59:11 a less than ideal day.
10:59:12 Because the plan… if the plan only works,
10:59:15 When you feel good, when everything's going the way that it should,
10:59:21 then the plan's not gonna work.
10:59:23 So, what… even on the worst day,
10:59:29 what is the plan?
10:59:34 And keep… and keep the promise to yourself. When you, keep the promises small.
10:59:41 Small, but make sure they matter.
10:59:43 And that will build more trust than making big promises to yourself and breaking them.
10:59:52 And then, and I cannot say this loud enough…
10:59:57 acknowledge yourself when you follow through.
10:59:59 It's not bragging, it's not conceit, it's not pride.
11:00:04 It's recognition. I did what I said I was going to do.
11:00:10 I said I was gonna do something, and I did it.
11:00:14 And nobody else…
11:00:16 was holding me accountable for it. It was just me.
11:00:20 And that can be really a habit tracker, is a great way to celebrate getting that check, or now I write stars on my habit tracker.
11:00:30 That is a little dopamine hit just in itself. Like…
11:00:34 That is how I celebrate. I did this thing, yay, me!
11:00:38 And then, when you don't follow through,
11:00:43 No shaming.
11:00:46 Missed days, imperfect follow-through. It's okay. You just want it to be the exception, not the rule.
11:00:55 And maybe…
11:00:57 you want to be disappointed for not doing it.
11:01:00 So that you know I feel so much better when I do this, but you do not want to shame yourself. Shame…
11:01:06 does not belong here. Should equals shame.
11:01:09 We don't shoot ourselves.
11:01:13 And then move on, tell the truth. I didn't do this because…
11:01:18 This is how I'm going to do it better next time.
11:01:21 Adjust the plan, eliminate the drama.
11:01:25 And remember that we are working on faithfulness, not perfection.
11:01:31 progress, not perfection.
11:01:34 Persistence, not perfection.
11:01:40 Now…
11:01:42 Follow through is
11:01:44 a form of self-care. It's how we take care of ourselves. It's how we…
11:01:50 can be filled.
11:01:53 to overflowing.
11:01:55 We don't over… have to overhaul everything.
11:01:57 What's one promise you're already starting to keep with yourself?
11:02:03 What's one thing that you're going to work on?
11:02:07 You are worth showing up for.
11:02:11 You were created, you are God's worksmanship created in Christ Jesus for good works. He has prepared
11:02:19 in advance for you to do.
11:02:23 You are loved, you are chosen,
11:02:25 You're redeemed, you are forgiven.
11:02:28 You are worthy. Jesus died for you.
11:02:31 He set your worth.
11:02:33 You don't have to do anything else.
11:02:37 And you can learn to trust yourself.
11:02:40 One… one little…
11:02:42 important step at a time.
11:02:48 If… if you want, again, I have my self-care stewardship of 31-day devotional linked in the show notes.
11:02:56 And also, my new planner that just got published.
11:03:01 the Life on Purpose Planner, which will definitely help you to do this, to make the decision
11:03:07 to plan for it, to follow through, to celebrate.
11:03:10 those follow-throughs.
11:03:13 That link is also in the show notes. Thank you so much for being here.
11:03:17 Remember that life coaching is life-changing, one renewed thought at a time.
